SeEking my Polaris

thursday 25th..
Lasik Surgery Clinic
330pm

As i was seated outside in the operating theatre.. all dressed up in the green gown.
awaiting for the surgeon to be available. i was in a mess of nerves. but frankly, the long
wait did help to calm me down. i waited like about 1 hour and 30 mins? while i was asked to rest my eye.. and the wait turned into a mild cough.. i was getting all nervous that what i discussed earlier with Soo might come true! i hurriedly asked for a cup of warm water to soothe my throat n sucked on a sweet. More waiting..

out of a sudden, the nurse called me name. i was quicky ushered into the operating room.. it was cramped with lotsa equipments.. Dr Tay was there with 2 nurses. I was asked to sit on a chair & subsequently be put to lied down.. and being put under a microscopic looked alike machine, i could sense the Doc the adjusting my eyes to be under tha laser. Frankly i was all squashy and nervous then. the mask made my breathing more n more difficult. Doc asked how am i feeling? and told me step by step the things he will be doing to me. [ok, at least i dont feel like a pig waiting to be slaughted]

he plastered my eye lashes up and a piece of plastic to cover my entire face except the eye to be operated on. a clipper was used to forced open my lids, and adjusted to the width he desired. a suction was then placed over my eyeballs.. and all went black. after that i could feel all the liquid.. and saw my own cornea being cut into a flap~ gOsh. i breathe harder. Doc asked me to focus on the red blinking light.. no, there werent other lights to confuse me. so i focus n began to chant under my breath 'God.. be with me ok'. it sorta helped me get through and the laser part was over. The sound is pretty loud & yes, there is definitely a burning smell.
Soon after the doc was closing my flap back.. and see lotsa liquid again.. then he use a small sponge attached to a stick, to wipe my cornea evenly, making sure there are no creases, bubbles or unevenness. I thought the worst was over, until he said, 'ok good, now the other eye.'
i gestured a stop sign and told him literally that 'Doc, i cant breath!' hahahhahaa.
The doc immediately asked the nurse to cut a hole in my mask..
and he asked whether that was ok, i told him ya. much much better.

the second eye didnt go as well.. i could see him cut open the cornea flap, and then.. i think the cut wasnt an ideal one. he used the sponge to put it back again. requested for more wetness.. and then he flipped it opened again. Die liao la... so the laser part came and go.. this time i was able to focus better though i'm in a dazed by the trauma. After he put me back into the normal position.. he examined my eyes and said they are ok. he told me that he had put contact lens in my eyes and will remove them the very next day. see! i knew something wasnt quite right! was quite taken aback by the entire surgery.. hmm.. i feel that, i went through life n death. yes, it was that bad. cos my eyes seemed to just be another object and not part of my body, i was utterly under the mercy of the surgeon.

nonetheless i went outside n waited for nurese to undress me and put eyedrops. plastic shields were put across my eyes. i felt like 'The Fly'. while outside, my eyes start to sting and i realised they forgot to give me the additional box of refresh eyedrops that i had bought. so i enquired with nurse. despite my uncomfy & pain, the nurses were still checking with one another before reluctantly passing me a box. i was very cheesed off and said sternly.. 'Do you want top open my bag to check?' they immediately stopped their saga and apologised for the miscommunication. i stormed out.. in pain.

while waiting for cab, the right eye was tearing.. tearing.. tearing.. pain shot through. i couldnt open my eyes at all and it was v glaring all around. on the cab i could only cover both my eyes over the eye shield. it was quite tormenting. luckily A was with me and took care of everything. after we reached home about 6pm, i ate pandan cake & yakitori [yes, i was very hungry], popped the sleeping pill went to sleep.
Note: draw all curtains, put eye mask over shield & sleep is the best resort!

when i woke up in the night, the stinging pain & tearing was gone.
i knew the worst was over.
and these few days i will just concentrae on getting well and resting my eyes!

+++

26th, friday...

OMG! i woke up and vision was quite alright. though my right eye's[the naughty one] was much better than the left. washed up using the wipes for my eyes.. and went for my review. It was a short wait, the doc was v well-dressed in his shirt and pants, of course, he had to look his part ya. He looked at my eyes and told me he will be taking out my 'contact lens'. He asked me to look to the right, and he used a metal fine tweezer to gently pry out the lens. wow.. that was pro! i dont feel a thing at all. I enquired about the contact lens, and he said he put lens in 30-40% of his patients to make sure the cornea flap was put back nicely and healed nicely. I was thinkin to myself, ok la, at least he didnt compromise the healing of my flap. I still have about 100 deg left. Everything went well.. and soon i was out of there in 15 mins. The next review will be in 2 weeks time.

I very bravely took a bus back by myself.. the left eye is still blur and the right eye has 90% vision already. Thanks everyone for the concern again.. you made my heart warm though it is indeed a tramatising experience that i choose to go through. I give myself a clap. didnt know 2007 will start with a bang! Now i just have to learn to live with unbalance vision for the time being.. god, pls help me ya. will post pictures when i feel better soon.

Labels: LASIK 2007, Rants

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