SeEking my Polaris

Would like to suggest that NONE of you go watch ‘Be With You’, the Japanese supposedly romantic, sappy tearjerker. Cos it didn’t fail to jerk a few yawns out of me. And jerk me to close my eyes more than 3 times. And jerk me to disturb my partner. And jerk myself into thinking about ‘How I wish Im watching Initial D for a 2nd time instead!’

The lead actor some more not handsome one. Sianz half liao. Only the lead actress is pretty.. so dear guy friend got the time of his life to ogle at her.. making those irritating ‘sighs’.. ‘OMG…’ whimpering sound when she laughed, or looked intently at the lead actor [who happened to be called Takumi as well, but different from my Takumi from Initial D], or looked shyly when he kissed her. This same guy friend expressed the same [how i wish she was my gf] sentiments while watching 'Divergence' but the target was 'Li Xin Jie' that time. muahahaha~
Then my dear girlfriend turned and looked at me after the show,
and we both said, [Chey! NOT NICE DE!]

- Don’t understand why TNP review gave it 4 blardy stars!

So.. I went home with a migraine in a stupid stuffy cab. Migraine cos of rain yest.. & cos its gonna rain this morning. & cos got caught in the rain before show.. Feel so stupid. All for the stupid show. Then went home on an empty stomach some more, cos the creamy spaghettis at cartel doesn’t go down very well with me, I barely touched it. But still thanks for the dinner. Ya you, you know who you are. The soup n ILT helped me survived through the night. :)

On msn last night:
Jimmy: [so how was the show? Did you cry??]
Me: [Got ar… when I yawned during the show probably got a few tears ba]
Jimmy: […… hahahahah~ dun crap la!]

Well.. to make up for it, I had 2 great company. Finally had time to catch up w them. And met wee2 who was watching the same show too! Keke.. These would make me go through the ordeal again. The company counts all the time ma. :)

I cant really get to sleep yesterday night,
Not sure why, didn’t overdose myself with caffeine,
no strenuous exercise,
not on an empty stomach..
Still cant sleep until 245pm
I began to doze off
But bizarrely I didn’t sleep like a log..
I was waken up again and again by my OWN dreams
Like in this scenario
There were those temple banners decorating this room..
And I was lying in a fetus position in a corner of the room
My folks were around n some others whom I dunno
Then mum n this some other person were shaking me
Kept shaking me can calling my name
Asking me to wake up
I really dun feel like waking up as I was very very tired
But mum was very persistent
And she wore such nice clothes as if she were about to go out
So I decided to open my eyes slowly..
Then before that
I remembered 3 numbers that were very vivid in the dream
But when I opened my eyes, I saw darkness,
The bright room was gone
I was lying on my own bed
Exactly in that fetus position
It wasn’t how I usually sleep
So eerie…

My dear friend, no horror stories before I sleep pls.

Replacement of atm : $5
Replacement of IC: $100
Replacement of License: $25
Loss of Ezlink: $35
Loss of cash: $250

The look on SunnySideUp face: Priceless

But…. Hang on.

My wallet is Found [minus the cash of cos] and returned on friday!
The kind souls from bird park sent the wallet personally to my house.
Though I wasn’t home but when I received the good news from my folks
I was really overwhelmed.
God answered my prayers.. and I believed some people out there who have been praying with me.
The joy is completing.

had a good laugh reading rene's appeal letter to TP for waiving a fine. She is damn good at cooking up stories and 'stirring up storms'. 'Times are hard...' My foot! Her hubby drove a toyota corolla.. they are gettin a flat @ the Pinnacles (neh, the v tall & atas HDB flat)

The lucky gal got her break when last week TP called her and say her appeal is successful.
she was all smiles... saved 70 bucks for an email full of crap. haaahaa~ some people just hv natural talent.

> -----Original Message-----
> From: Irene Toh
> Sent: Monday, June 06, 2005 2:01 PM
> To: 'spf_feedback_tp@spf.gov.sg'
> Subject: Appeal Against Fine/ Serial# 175401/A
> Importance: High
>
> Dear Sir/ Madam
>
> APPEAL AGAINST PARKING FINE/ SERIAL NO 175401/ A
>
> I would like to apologise for the inconveniences caused due to my
negligence. Attached doc is for your perusal.
>
> Vehicle No: SFA 6819 P
> Owner:
> IC No:
>
> On the very day, I was requested to do an urgent delivery. I do not
normally drive to work, hence the car was driven by my husband to me on a
last minute notice. He came with his colleague in 2 separate cars.
Thereafter, he left the car along the road for my perusal and left in his
colleague's vehicle. There was a time interval between the arrival of my
husband's car and my physical presence in the car. This is because the
logistics personnel took longer than expected to prepare the neccessary
documents.
>
> Please kindly give my appeal due consideration. My husband and I are
currently trying very hard to safe up so as to start a family. Times are
bad and I hope you are able to empathize with us and grant us leniency in
this case. I will definitely oblige to the the rules and regulations in the
future. Your gracious approval will be greatly appreciated. Awaiting for
your positive reply. Thank you.
>
> Yours Sincerely
> Ms Irene Toh

Initial D movie was great yest! Jay was great!
everyone laughed at his silly ways.. but he portrayed Takumi really well.
except the crying part when he left his gf, that looked like acting :S
enjoyed myself thoroughly~

art> since i cant leave comments on yOUr blog, i shall leave it here! he doesnt look abit like pan mei chen ok! though the small slit eyes might lokk a wee bit familiar.. but doesnt ALL small slit eyes looked alike? huh huh huh?

Initial D will make it Big. I already foresee a sequel, and a sequel's sequel, like Internal Affairs.
But i guess no one will get any Jing Ma Jiang for Best Actor from this show. The closest would probably be Anthony Wong getting Best Supporting Actor in his Buento Fujiwara role ;p

+++

poor titus injured his back and foot while playing soccer.
he's been bugging me to fetch him for tim sum.
and he entertains me with smses; he will start with
'yi ah... wad r u doin tonite?'
he even sms me what he thinks of his new V3 phone..
like the pros n cons.. sometimes i am amused by him
i have been quite busy lately with church and other commitments
so i didnt really bring him anywhere.
think he must be too bored lying at home for the past week hUh.
i will try harder ok, i promise.

i understand how it feels when others seemed too busy for you
not even an sms or call.
then you start to think 'how much do they really care about you?'
when their stuff is done maybe..
then.. @ times like this, you hv to tell yourself to be strong
and get back on your feet quick even when problems arises
because you only have yourself to lean on
do i blame them?
No. because i understand everyone has their own priorities & thinking.
will i put others through the same ordeal?
No. because i know the feeling sucks big time.
i will try, i promise.

+++

wow~ wad bad luck?
i think you all got the wrong number.

i happened to be at Lido yest.. meeting a friend for dinner
[by the way pasta fresca closed down liao, dont make a wasted trip]
THEN! guess what?
Initial D stars were walking the red carpet and going for the movie premiere at LidO..
wow.. i nearly flipped.
friend and i chopped a nice nice place next to the 2 long escalators leading to the theatre
we were inside enjoying the aircon, chatting, waiting for the stars to stroll up the escalators
no need to jostle with crowd outside okayyy

and first came Ah Bee... i waved a abit and he waved back
then came Edison Chan.. really dashing this guy. Young but Very handsome.
he was in green with a GI haircut. i waved to him, and he waved back with a smile.
then came Shawn Yu [dunno how to spell his name]
thiS guy has the height.. and he was cool. he didnt start waving at first.
so when he was facing my direction, i waved again n again
he shot me his megawatt smile and waved back~ *melted*
of cos, there is Anthony Wong next. this one not really my cup of tea la, SKIP.
last... but not least....
JAY JAY JAY!!!
he was skipping up the steps.. so cool n suave.
he wore a floral print white shirt and carried it really well!
he didnt wave to anyone but he smile shyly and kept focusing on the steps as he went up
very boy next door lor
he is so near... and the screams from fans became skrieking
friend was busy taking pictures [with HP] and we had a really nice chat too throughout the wait though everything was impromptu.

my god.. i saw them ALL!
up close and personal~

tOnight Initial D preview it will be. Free tics again.. haa!

Its no wonder they say ‘a string of bad luck’…
Did I tell you I crashed my HP casing yesterday night?
The whole darling dropped onto the floor [for the umpteenth time]
And the back casing was crashed. Split into two instantaneously.
I bought a new solid black casing today with the limited cash that i have.

Black for depressing.

And you are not here still.

actually it was quite an eventful weekend
but i really hv no mood to blog about stuff now
i wanna go lie down
i frigging lost my wallet
not sure why or what happened
when i came home from the bird park it was no longer in my bag anymore
i feel like crying
my ic, license, atm, cr card, cash, and sentimental valued burberry wallet
gone jus like that
didnt wait for me to even say goodbye

Finally.. some church camp fotos to share!!!

I am simply dumb founded when people come up to ask me

So hows your church camp?

Wooo.. sound so exciting, been some time since I went to a real camping you know?

Did you all had campfire?

How do you all cook?

People, dont make me flip. Church camp is just a figure of speech for a church retreat. I liked the part about eating most. Everyone will be seated at the table and guessing what will be served. We had a few surprises since we are in our good old neighboring country and not good old SG. . If I sound abit sarcastic its meant to be. Anyways.. no pun intended, its just differences in culture.

Wasnt feeling too well this camp but I must really say that a lot of times I was in reflective mode. Hmm.. dunno how to put it in words also. Its a conversation I had between God and me. I walked away feeling broken [because of His revelations on my weaknesses n insecurities] yet I am assured of His love. My fears & inadequacies are all laid bare in front of him. Im nothing. Just like you are nothing. We live for a purpose but sometimes we tried so hard to run away from that purpose.

True? You tell me J

Alright. Probably I didn’t do him justice.
Some memories started flooding me.. sense of guilt plunged at me.
Remembered that once, when I was still in aust.
I received a surprised bouquet of roses on my birthday
He specially called up Perth’s florist from Sg and delivered it to me.
[we were celebrating & staying over at a friend’s house and he bothered ta find out the address from my friend and sent it there specially]
But
Instead of being happy and swooned over the bouquet
I was very upset with him
I dunno leh
Feel like he is stalking me lor
Maybe I had a really bad impression of him
But still, I don’t understand my reactions then
I just recalled that I didn’t give him the green light to woo me
And that’s why the sweetest gesture from him turned into a nightmare for me
I don’t want to feel like I owed him something
But
He was really very sweet
He continued to call me [overseas call damn expensive one, sometimes I pretend not to hear the phone ring, pretend that im sleep]
When I’m online, I put him on invisible list [last time still ICQ mah]
But
He still called

Once I was back in sg for vacation for my birthday
Got a surprised parcel.
It was a pair of Meyson’s [think now no more Meyson right?] diamond earrings from him.
In the card he wrote, ‘I hope sending these earrings wont offend you like the flowers did. I just want to wish you happy birthday….’
And I wasn’t even his girlfriend at all!
Touched or not?
Frankly I was touched by his gesture, but again, I told him not to do these things for me anymore.
Till today, still don’t understand why he still bothered to keep in contact with me
And listen to my woes when I’m feeling down at times
I urged him to get attached
And I think by now he finally did
Happy for him, really J
At least.. I wont continue to feel bad towards him for the rest of my life.

When we talked about these vintage memories sometime ago, I apologized to him.
Find my behavior very childish.
But
He didn’t even mind.
He said, it is fine as long as we are still friends.

From a friend's macau trip.. nice of him to drop a cd rom of his holidae pictures in my letter box. I realised his photo-taking skills has improved over these years. never really made a point to keep in touch with him since aust except thru sms & email. felt kinda bad ;p.

Posting these pics on my blog shld do them justice :) thanks for remembering me.

Oh no.
I feel seriously impaired in communication
Would never have imagine this sentence coming from me
The feeling is stirring within me again
I wished I could evaporate like water..
We cant seemed to see eye to eye;
The distance between us growing in leaps
I have given up trying to make him see where I’m coming from
Its just me, giving up too easily
If this is going nowhere
I wish we could call it a day now
Need to lean on someone
Need to lie down
Need a hug
Need to get better soon

This morning I woke up with a surprised of my life!
As usual I was lai chuan-ing on my bed…
Alarm went off at 740am..
and I snoozed it for a couple of times which was the standard procedures
Finally 8:05am..
I reluctantly turned to my left side (that’s my waking up position)
Opening my left eye first to check the wall clock to make sure my HP alarm isn’t playing tricks on me. Then I opened the other eye as well to adjust the parallax error…
I nearly let out a scream.. !
I can see perfectly!!!
My vision were back to 6/6!!!
OMG!
The blurred world is once again filled with colours n sharpness n contrast n brightness n I could see my toes wriggling… hahaah~

I think hard
& I think harder…
yesterday I reached home past midnight..
then I called to report that I was safely home
& to console someone who thought he has been caught at the red light camera
then I washed my face….
No no, I think I washed my dirty face first
After I hang up.. I closed my eyes n fell into a deep trance
And I slept like nobody’s business
As the memory of last night flooded my little head
Something strikes me hard
I forgot to take out my contacts lens laaaaaaaaaaaaa……
& I slept with them till morning!
For a while
I thought a miracle did happen after my church camp.
Ha ha ha
So silly…

Relationships are imperfect
Even marriage is fallible
Seemed like nothing is everlasting these days
Post modernization – where people seek individual gratifications;
Commitment is the BIG word that has been thrown out of the window
I got married because I feel like love at that moment
I filed for separation because 'sorry, I want out'.
Feelings drove us to decisions
And the very fact that our feelings are like roller coaster
Our life became a roller coaster ride in the making
Nobody sees everlasting as a by product of commitment
If you do,
Yes, you are naïve.

Met up with 2 poly friends last night, A & J. Both got ROM last year (separately) and both are going through separation now. It seemed their partners want to seek greener pasture. One for career, the other, a third party maybe. What seemed like juicy scandals left me chilled down my spine. The food on the table is getting cold, and we continued eating to hide the embarrassing silence that followed the deadly truth. It was good to catch up, and to lend a listening ear to old time friends. We parted with a promise to meet up for a drink next month. Friends sometimes found each other through adversity. And I will be there.

周董耍帅...

take care everyone~ i'm out for this week.. ta~!

Rainy dayz always gets me melancholic.
Plus the fact that i havent been sleeping well.
Major Insomnia on the run.
Calling & Smsing people in the middle of the night.
Calling & Smsing people at the break of dawn.
sorrrrrry laaa...


p/s: whos the fastest character in starwars to draw out his light sabre?

Think abit can?...




Ans: An-ne-kin (in Hokkien)


;p.... LOUSY!!!

Been popping pills since sat, to sustain my activities these few days. .. I seriously really need people to invent those ‘viagra’ typed pills for my strength n alertness n vibrancy OR something like Poppye [ Popeye la :) - thanks to a v smart ass ;p ] the sailorman or Gummy bears typed of super potent supplement that would help me in desperate circumstances! But that’s not what I wanna blog about laaa… ;p

My very very [ I repeat, VERY VERY ] 好姐妹 got ROM yesterday!!!…
The golden date 06-06-05… keke. She looked raaaadiant, beaaaaaming, glooooowing, glaaaaamourous, beauuuuuutiful, princess-like n all grown up~! Got a lumped in my throat when I saw her, don’t know how to start congratulating her cos words just don’t seemed enough. She’s a person that has 95% access to me [ Ya,. was super duper tired n stressed n sick yest but I just cant miss her ROM for anything ], she can call me anytime and I will fly down to be by her side! Maybe she didn’t know that so she hasn’t been abusing that privilege. Hee.. Now she has hubby beside her, I am elated & overjoyed for her.. In her ups and downs there will be someone sharing it with her. Die laaaa, getting very sentimental... [Shed a tear~]

Her ROM dinner reception was just like a little gathering for us, ex-noelians, plus a few more mutual friends alike. And the night was spiced up with very candid speeches by L of her blurness & bluntness as well as poking fun of SS; also Joy for allowing herself to be our object of teasing throughout the night. Even AC & Cyn was there! Good catch up session I must say!

Weewee will always remain a very dear friend, I think sometimes it definitely takes chemistry n fate to meet this kind of person in yr life. & I’m glad to meet her~ :) I will always see her as a simple, kindhearted and good-natured gal within, [ Guys, I feel so sad for you that she is taken up ;p ] Right now, doors has been open for her career, I really pray that she will receive all the blessings n land herself in a job that will satisfy her job fulfillment as well as financial commitments of marriage. The road ahead is long.. probably winding, but God has place someone wonderful alongside her to walk through this journey together.

Am so Looking forward to 06-06-06! NiCeeee! :)

went to the airport to fetch my folks on sun evening.. my nieces tagged along and they looked like peaches! so rosy n pink n cUte.. keke.. played with them for almost an hour before i saw my folks strolling out of Belt 21, carrying alot alot of luggages. They must hv bought back half of HK! Mum spent a bomb there, buying each of us a white gold chain plus pendant. Mine was a cross w a diamond. It was pretty nice but abit chunky for my liking, [think: those Hip-Hop singers/dancers alike, hahah of cos i was exaggerating la]... We chided her for spending so much on our gifts but she said something that shut us all up... 'Parents always have the interests of their kids in their hearts'. :)

Went for Singtel Streetfestival 3loGy competition held outside Mandarin Hotel. Its something similar to ‘Amazing Race’ but of cos of a smaller scale..


Daniel Ong & Jaime Yeo was the host for the day for Singtel. Jaime was trying to pose for my camera phone, so pro~ ;p


we were expected to complete 3 tasks @ 3 checkpoints along orchard road [ the fun part was that we hv to guessed the checkpoints based on the video clips inside the Motorola 3G phone, each team was given one for the game…] I entered the heats w angel and only 1 team will be qualified for the finals for that slot.


G n FK formed another team. Initially we wanted to exchange clues but it ended up that our video clips clue were all different!


Our first checkpoint was at Indochine outside Wisma.. can you imagine I ran all the way from Cineleisure to there? I almost died! So I asked Angel to run along first [he did all the leg work!] and I will catch up using my superb brisk walk techniques, not trailing to those of Olympics caliber ;p


along the way.. I saw my IDOL host, Jeff Wang! I think he is fliming for some tv prog. decided not to distract him, and i ran along...


And I managed to catch some breath outside checkpoint 2, which is back to cineleisure ‘Cheers’ store. The clue was ‘Movies 24-7’ I dun even hv to open the video clips to know where to run to. [ya, act smart la]… and the game master asked us to download a song from our 3G phone.. darn, that took us like 10 mins cos the internet connection was like facing some cyber road block or something. I saw time ticking away and I tried to act cute with him, I pleaded ‘you just tell me the title I will sing for you laaaa’ then I realized not every guy buy this kind of nonsense or maybe I make-up must hv melted by then. He shot me a look and say’ no thanks, there’s another team who sang me ‘marikita’ and I wished I dun hv to listen to them sing’.. duhz~ I ended up taking silly photos of myself while he continues with the task of wasting our precious time.

The 3rd checkpoint was fun, I recognized the DKNY café canopies from the video clip immediately! We ran across the street and found the game master. This guy is nicer and he helped us download a movie from his HP set cos ours is really problematic. I chose the movie trailer for ‘Starwars Episode III’ [what else?? Cos we need to ask a passerby to tell us the movie title that we hv downloaded] I grabbed a young couple and asked them for 5 mins, luckily I wasn’t rejected ;) as expected, without a hitch, the guy got the answer correct almost immediately.


I called back to report to my game marshal, and she asked us to hurry back to strike the Gong. Oh, did I tell you there was a cameraman following us while we ran back to strike the ‘GonG’? ya, its exactly like ‘十字路口’… so was quite fun lor. Then everyOne came round to congratulate us, we came in first!!!! Haaa… the Redbull gals parading around immediately passed us their chilled drinks. Very nice!


The rest of the groups came back one by one and FK team was 4th. The singtel ppl took a silly picture of us to allow the public to vote of the finalist to see who would come out tops, the photos will be placed in the booth along orchard road. After all the excitement.. we realized to our utter disappointment that the finals will be held on the 12th. We wont be in SG due to our Church Camp!!! Boo hoo hoo….. the drama ended. We took our goodies bag [4 free movie passes, plus 2 PC online game set] n informed the organizers of the walkover. So the 2nd team will qualify and they came round to say their thanks to us. Ok la… a couple of young boys, maybe they stand a better chance of winning in the finals [but I doubt they hv my wits though, muahahha~]



ta~

woo hoo~ im going for the event below.. it shld be fun~ and technologically challenging~! I'm not called techno savvy for nothing alright? haa.. i guess i am still v keen on these things where some HC people might find it bo liao. i definitely want to try new things. i just realised that the finals will be held on 12th June, which i wont be in town. But heck, just go the heats first and get those damn goodies bags! ;p

Upload pics later if i get a chance to snap some nice ones!

Thank you for registering for SingTel's 3loGy Wireless City Challenge.
This email confirms your place in Heat session 1 which will be held
on 4th June 05 and 1430hr.

Please kindly note the following:
Report for registration and briefing 45 mins before your race.
Attendance for the briefing is compulsory.
Wear light clothing and comfortable shoes. Be sure to drinks lots of
fluid as well
Read the terms and conditions provided at
http://www.singaporestreetfestival/singtel
Should you have any enquries on the 3loGy Wireless City Challenge, do
drop us a mail at wirelesscitychallenge@gmail.com or contact number
at 9017 4904.
Last but not least, please kindly print a copy of this letter & bring
it along with your NRIC for verification.
Thank you for your time and attention; & GOOD LUCK!

Best Regards
The 3loGy Wireless City Challenge Organizing Committee

不懂你的黑色幽默

想通却又再考倒我

说散你想很久了吧

我不想拆穿你

当作是你开的玩笑

想通却又再考倒我

说散你想很久了吧

我的认真败给黑色幽默

an old sOng that lingers
i saw it in my MP3 CD yest
a sOng that i heard on the radio this morn
i remembered playing it feverently when i got it
till jaz was complaining that, that must be the only song in my playlist ;p
suddenly it all came rushing back to me
i remember who sent it to me
this song is making me upset.

Tired.. lack of sleep. Parents went off early in the morning
Woke up to bid them farewell..
Didn’t sleep well during the night & its affecting my concentration at work
My eyes are puffy; I look like shite
Using the entire jar of eye cream wont help
Should I cancel my appointment tonight to grab some rest?
But I hv been staying home for the past 2 days to hv dinner, and catch Initial D anime

Very nice show.. graphics are v realistic
Cant wait for Jay to star as Takumi.. I really think he is the best choice avail.
But Takumi [the lead] is less aloof.. he is a very humble guy, and somewhat detached from the real world of fancy car racing. He loves cars, and the beauty of its mechanics.
Fancy cars doesn’t impress him, in fact, he just want to excel himself
when he won a race, he had the champion feel about him.
Seldom was there a harsh or insulting word from him to the losers.
I can continue on and on with this, but really my mind is kinda in a blank now.
How to survive till 6pm?!!